Healing Through the Holidays – Self-Care for Navigating Tough Times

As the holiday season approaches, it can feel like an emotional rollercoaster. For those of us navigating grief or going through challenging times, the holidays can amplify our feelings—both of joy and sorrow. To help ease some of this burden, I’ve created a new series called Healing Through the Holidays, where we’ll explore different self-care tools for this season. And we’re starting with a theme that is at the heart of moving through tough times: hope.

Why Hope Matters

Hope is a powerful anchor that connects us to something beyond the heaviness of the present moment. While hope doesn’t change our circumstances or erase our pain, it lightens our load, giving us something to hold on to, even if it’s just a small glimmer. Brene Brown has a beautiful perspective on this, saying, “We develop hope not during the easy or comfortable times, but through adversity and discomfort.”

Hope doesn’t have to be grand; it can be a quiet whisper, a reminder that things can improve, even if we’re unsure when or how. Without it, we risk feeling trapped or even paralyzed by grief. But with hope, we open ourselves up to the possibility of healing, of light, of new life beyond what we’re experiencing right now.

Cultivating Hope in Difficult Times

Even if your hope feels small right now, that’s okay. The beauty of hope is that it doesn’t need to be overwhelming to be meaningful. A small, quiet hope is just as powerful, and even a tiny bit of it can make a difference during challenging days.

To help cultivate this sense of hope, I want to share a simple practice that can guide us in letting go of a little of what’s weighing us down and creating more room for hope in our hearts.

Practice: Opening to Hope

This practice only takes a few minutes and is a powerful way to release some of your burdens while making space for hope. You can follow these steps:

  1. Get Grounded:
    Begin either seated or standing. Feel the earth beneath you, your feet anchored and supported. Let your spine lengthen, and feel the top of your head reach for the sky. If it feels comfortable, close your eyes. Take a few slow breaths here, feeling the air move in and out.

  2. Affirm Hope:
    Gently say out loud, “My heart is open with hope.” Take a moment to repeat this three times, feeling each word resonate in your chest. Notice if you feel any small shift as you repeat it.

  3. Release a Burden:
    As you inhale, raise your arms overhead and bring to mind something that’s weighing on you. As you exhale, throw your arms back and “throw away” that burden. You might want to say a strong “HA” as you do this or name what you’re letting go of.

    For example, you might say, “I want to release worry.” Inhale as you reach your arms up, and exhale with intention, throwing that worry behind you. Repeat this movement a few times, allowing yourself to find a rhythm of release.

  4. Fold Forward and Cleanse:
    After you’ve released, gently fold forward, as if you’re letting go of any remaining struggle. Visualize a gentle waterfall washing over you, cleansing and renewing you, carrying away any tension, sorrow, or weight.

  5. Open to Hope Again:
    Come back to your starting position and place your hands over your heart. Notice how releasing these burdens has created a bit more room for hope. Feel that possibility, however faint it might seem right now.

  6. Affirm Hope One More Time:
    Take a few deep breaths and, once again, say, “My heart is open with hope.” Repeat this three times. Breathe deeply, and when you’re ready, open your eyes.

Finding Light in the Dark

I hope this practice gives you a sense of lightness and peace. Remember that hope is not about ignoring our pain; it’s about believing in the possibility of healing and growth, even when we can’t see the full path ahead. The holidays can be difficult, but let’s try to hold onto hope in our hearts, however small, as a guiding star through dark times.

Hope reminds us that our pain is not the whole story, that there’s more waiting for us in the days to come. So, as you move through this season, may you find moments of hope, love, and light. And on the days when hope feels far away, let this practice help you create a little space for it.

You’re not alone on this journey. May we each be gentle with ourselves and continue opening up to the possibility of brighter days ahead.

Join the email list to receive the weekly Healing Through the Holidays email series, Find more resources on my website including Tips for Grief Relief and Healing Hearts: A Roadmap for Suicide Loss Survivors.

Susan Andersen